Saturday, April 14, 2007

The Weekly iPod Shuffle: 4/14/07 (Special Expanded Meme Edition)

To spruce up this week's shuffle, I'm borrowing a meme that has swept over a quarter of my readership. (That fourth, of course, is Lucas, one of my four readers. I thank you: now I can be lazy and unoriginal at the same time!)

Essentially, I answer each question with a random song from my library, providing accompanying lyrics and commentary for each. As always, you're invited to play along at home.

How do you feel emotionally? - "Heaven Is a Better Place Today," The Tragically Hip
A toonie to the busker and a husky "Keep it comin'" under my breath
Then say, "But if you wouldn't mind, less cryin' and more tryin'
More tryin' and less cryin'"

Over the past six months, I've used less bitching about my own circumstances and more actual effort to change things -- getting a second job, for instance. The result is a better situation, with means that most of the time these days I am -- like today -- pretty pleased. Go figure.

(Oh, a toonie, by the way, is Canadian slang for their two-dollar coin. In case you were puzzled.)

How do you feel about your life? - "Don't Tread on Me," Metallica
So be it
Settle the score
To secure peace is
To prepare for war

I do tend to have a scorched earth attitude when it comes to certain people in my life -- I hold a grudge like no one I know.

Where do you see yourself ten years from now? - "All My Friends," Counting Crows
At seventeen had a better dream
Now I'm thirty-three, and it isn't me
But I'd think of something better if I could
All my friends and lovers leave me behind
And I'm still looking for a girl
One way or another, I'm just hoping to find
A way to put my feet out in the world

Exactly. Pessimist much.

Describe your sex life. - "Ring of Fire," Johnny Cash
Love is a burning thing
And it makes a fiery ring
Bound by wild desire
I fell into a ring of fire


Describe your personality. - "Eat It," "Weird Al" Yankovic
How come you're always such a fussy young man?
Don't want no Capt'n Crunch, don't want no Raisin Bran
Well, don't you know that other kids are starving in Japan?
So eat it, just eat it

Okay: is this saying that I'm a humorous smart-ass? Or that I'm fat? 'Cause, really, either side has a good argument to make. (Not joking: I'm eating a Bacon Ultimate Cheeseburger as I'm writing this. My iPod has become fully sentient. Run!)

What's the meaning of life? - "No Leaf Clover," Metallica and the San Fransisco Symphony Orchestra
And it comes to be
That the soothing light
At the end of your tunnel
Was just a freight train
Coming your way

Couldn't have said it better myself.

What do you have to offer the world? - "Intermittently," Barenaked Ladies
Every morning I just
Hit the ground yawning

Nothing much, really.

What do you think of love? - "Four Sticks," Led Zeppelin
Oh, baby, it's cryin' time
Oh, baby, I got to fly
Got to try to find a way
Got to try to get away
Cause you know I got to get away from you, babe

Pain. Pain, and misery. Run, run, run. Yeah, that's not too far off.

What do you hate? - "What is Pornography?" Bill Hicks
No one knows what pornography is. Supreme Court says pornography is any act which has no artistic merit and causes sexual thoughts. That's their definition, essentially: no artist merit, causes sexual thoughts. Hmm...sounds like...every fucking commercial on TV, doesn't it?

Oddly enough, I do indeed hate that. Not porno -- the bizarre hypocrisy of our culture; the one that will put any kind of rampant, blatant sexuality in the media, in commercials, in music, on television, and then turn around and go into national apoplexy when someone's nipple becomes exposed for a few seconds during the Super Bowl. Anyone who can explain that to me can go right ahead.

Are you religious? - "Kyur4 TH Ich," Linkin Park
[The song has no lyrics.]

An instrumental. Perhaps because the answer -- "Um, no." -- is painfully obvious to anyone who's spoken to me for more than fifteen minutes? I don't know, my iPod is calling the shots.

What makes you happy? - "Heresy," Pantera
They can lick my sack

Ah! -- one question late, Pantera.

What pisses you off? - "Trapped Under Ice," Metallica
Freezing, can't move at all
Screaming, can't hear my call
I am dying to live
Cry out, I'm trapped under ice

Being trapped, being stuck in a bad situation-- pisses me right the fuck off, actually.

What scares you? - "Tear Stained Letter," Johnny Cash
I'm gonna write a tear stained letter,
I'm gonna tell you one more time.
That you still could reconsider,
And come back to bein' mine.
An' if you think about what I'm sayin',
It'd be hard to refuse.

That, and wasps.

What is your best quality? - "Tell Me Why," Genesis
Who would think it still could happen
Even in this time and place?
Politicians, they may save themselves
But they won't save their face
So hope against hope it's not too late

That good old-fashioned liberal rage. Keith Olbermann would be proud.

What is your worst quality? - "What a Letdown," Barenaked Ladies
Even if I let this settle, it'll lead to a little fight
Even when I get to meddlin' I need to remain polite
I could cut across this field but it hits pretty close to home
Maybe if I jiggle it a little it'll open up on its own

My own procrastination and fear of confrontation. Yeah, okay.

What qualities do you look for in a friend? - "Together," The Raconteurs
And we'll always endeavor
Throughout any kind of weather

Says it all.

How do people perceive you? - "A Rush of Blood to the Head," Coldplay
So I'm gonna buy a gun and start a war

You have no idea how many times I've heard people say of me, "One of these days, man, J.'s just gonna lose it and go postal on everyone." Not true, but that's how people perceive me, it seems.

And finally...

How do you see the world? - "You," Radiohead
You, me and everything caught in the fire

I can see me drowning, caught in the fire
You, me and everything caught in the fire
and I can see me drowning, caught in the fire

As before: pessimist much.

Thank you for reading, as always.

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