He's not even nominated, but the voters will find some way to screw Kanye West over anyway, I'll bet

So the Grammy Award nominations were announced yesterday. I'd list them, but sweet Jesus, there are 110 categories. Go read them all if you want, but I can't imagine anyone really caring about the nominees for Best Instrumental Soloist(s) Performance (with Orchestra). Other than the nominees themselves, that is, and I'm fairly certain none of them read my blog.

A few random impressions, though:

• Radiohead is the other band the voters like to hose, so don't get too excited over the Album of the Year nod for In Rainbows. Even though it's the best record on that list. That doesn't matter. Not even a little bit. At all. The award will actually go to, as it always does, the oldest and/or deadest nominee -- in this case, Robert Plant, who's been dead since 1989.
• Nice to see Coldplay recognized for their evolution on Viva La Vida, easily their best work to date. And they're vanilla and mainstream enough to actually win some of those awards, like Record for the Year, which they actually deserve. Seriously, "Viva La Vida" is a perfect pop song. You couldn't get away from that damn thing.
• Do I see Jason Mraz's name listed under the nominees for Song of the Year? Really? I mean, really? Jason "Wizard of Oohs and Ahs and Fa-la-las" Mraz? That asshole? Really? I can't say I've heard the song in question, tell the truth, but I've got twenty bucks that he sings "de doo doo doo-doo-doo" a bunch of times in the chorus. Just a hunch.
• The Jonas Brothers? Die in a goddamn fire, Grammy voters.
• Kid Rock?! See previous.
• Strangely competitive category: Best Pop Performance. I think it's gotta go to Coldplay, but "Apologize" is a good one, too.
• All those fantastic songs on In Rainbows, and the voters pick "House of Cards" for the single-track categories. This is what I'm talking about.
• Your real Album of the Year: Narrow Stairs, by Death Cab for Cutie. Your Song of the Year is "Roc Boys" by Jay-Z, and your Record of the Year is "You Don't Know Me" by Ben Folds and Regina Spektor. You're welcome.

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Now playing: Death Cab for Cutie - Pity And Fear
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